Given the choice between a pest control product that can’t possibly work and a superfluous sequel that never should have been made, which would you let in your home? (more…)
“Availability unknown.” Harsher words were never spoken by a DVD mail order rental website.
Spoiler alert! The world didn’t end at midnight on January 1st, 2000. Sorry. (more…)
It’s Twin Peaks for dumb people! It’s Friday the 13th for, uh… people who hate hockey masks! (more…)
I was reading the ol’ A.V. Club today, and one thing I’ve consistently liked about their new format is the AVQ&A feature, in which they pose questions to their writers. It’s got the short attention span appeal of lists, but also makes it easy for you to get to know your bloggers without digging through their analysis (which is, like, hard and stuff).
This week’s AVQ&A is “What movie/TV show/album/whatever would you like to be able to see/hear again for the first time?” There’s the usual smattering of the slightly pretentious and the heart-warmingly sweet, but no one gave my answer. So I’m going to rectify that.
The X-Files. Stay with me now.
Look, I’m just gonna admit this right now. I know you’re all just gonna give me shit about it later anyway, so we might as well get it out of the way first. I FUCKING LOVE SANDRA BERNHARD. I love her and I wanna fill her with wine and flattery and then make sweet Cambodian monkey love to her until her sexy lesbi-paunch swells with my babies. And it’s all because of this old TV show that USA network used to play late night in the mid 90s. If you didn’t watch it, it was because of one of the following three reasons: 1) you were too young, 2) you were too much of a fucking loser, or 3) you were way too cool to spend your Saturday nights watching edited-for-TV versions of exploitation films from the 30s to the 70s introduced and snarkishly commented upon by the most freakishly sexy host on television.
No offense, dude, but I know you ain’t no number 3 case. So either you’ve seen this show, you’re a youngin’, or you’re a loser. You’s pays your nickel and you’s takes your pick. So, listen up, losers, this article is all about one of the greatest and un(der)sung shows of TV history.