Exhumed Films 24 Hour Horror-Thon Part IV (PART THREE)
III. THE FILMS (DAY ONE)
1. NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS
Prudent decision, I would say, to get the movie about sleeping out of the way during the first few hours of a 24 hour period of forced wakefulness. A bunch of sleep deprived kids in an insane asylum get knocked off one by one by the razor-gloved “bastard son of a thousand maniacs.” It’s a story that foreshadowed the coming twenty-four hours. Just like those droopy eyed Elm Street brats in the picture, each and every soul in this theater would in time succumb to the lunacy of sleeplessness — and, just like those kids, some of us wouldn’t make it to the end.
2. THE MIGHTY PEKING MAN
The program described the next movie simply as “giant monster movie.” I was told that traditionally Exhumed shows a Godzilla movie, so like everyone else I expected one of the many sequels that Toho churned out in that half century since the fire-shooting, Tokyo-destroying atom age metaphor first hit screens.
When the Shaw Brothers Studio logo hit the screen we were all somewhat surprised. I doubt many of us knew that those Hong Kong churner-outers of Kung-fu and Ninja movies ever tried their hands at giant monsters. And perhaps the few audience members who did didn’t have very high expectations.
As soon as the opening sequence started to roll there was a mass exodus, the likes of which would have made you think the back of the theater had caught on fire or NIGHT OF HORROR was playing. These folks didn’t know what they were about to miss.
Some Hong Kong entrepreneurs venture into the Himalayas to capture the giant King Kong clone known as Peking Man. After most of the shirpas who were guiding the expedition die in a series of gory leopard and elephant attacks, the remaining Hong Kongians decide to retreat back home, satisfied that they have proven sufficiently that there is no Peking Man. They were wrong though. One of their numbers discovers Peking Man and the sexy half-naked white lady with whom Peking Man is in love. He eventually takes them both back to civilization. Peking Man is forced into chains while the woman spurns the constrictions of cleavage-enhancing western dress.
Eventually, the lovelorn monster exploits a structural weakness in the Chinese-made monster cage, effects his escape, and goes Godzilla all over Hong Kong looking for his lady friend.
Pretty good movie. It kept me entertained and awake for another hour and a half. If you’re into giant monsters and post-colonialism, definitely check it out.
3. VAULTS OF HORROR
I love horror anthologies, maybe almost as much as my horrorthon companion Samm. (Check out her recent discussion of them). CREEPSHOW would have been a nice treat; CREEPSHOW II would have been even nicer. Any anthology — even the shittiest — I hadn’t seen before would have been great. TALES FROM THE CRYPT II, more widely known as VAULT OF HORROR was still a nice surprise. Even though I’ve seen it — and slept through it — before. Would I stay awake through its hackneyed comic book vignettes this time? Keep reading!
Carrying on the sleep-time theme introduced with the horrorthon’s first film, VAULT OF HORROR tells the story (well five stories really) of a group of strangers who get stuck in a room and — I guess just for the hell of it — relate the details of their realistic recurring nightmares. There’s an upscale restaurant, coiled rope, some spousal abuse, insurance fraud, and paintings. All employed in spooky ways, mind you.
I didn’t fall asleep. But next time I get stuck having to watch this movie, I’m taking the opportunity to reclaim that hour and half in the name of good King Sandman.
4. IT LIVES AGAIN
IT LIVES AGAIN is the followup to Larry Cohen’s 1974 mutant baby extravaganza IT’S ALIVE. This one’s got more mutant babies than the first — I think. I haven’t seen the first one in a while. The dad from the first movie comes back to help another family deal with the inevitable struggle which ensues when trying to give a good home to the next great leap in human evolution. It’s not going to be easy because the government is after them.
What? A heavy handed political message?! In a Larry Cohen movie?!
After the film we went out for a quick bite. In the middle of conversation, someone interrupted to inform us that the next feature had started. I quickly and unceremoniously detached myself from the group and raced to the theater. The messenger was wrong. When I got back to the theater a trailer was announcing that HALLOWEEN: RESSURECTION was “the night Michael came home.” For what it was worth, Michael should have stayed where he was. But it was a good thing that I didn’t stay where I was, because as soon as this crappy movie’s preview ended (along with the history of the slasher film? With not a bang but a whimper), the next film took over the screen — and if it was what I thought it was I didn’t want to miss a second of it.